• Personalizing. You blame yourself for everything.

• Magnifying. You focus on the negative aspects of a situation, ignoring any and all of the positive.

• Catastrophizing. You expect the worst, and you rarely let logic or reason persuade you otherwise.

• Polarizing. You see the world in black and white, or good and bad. There’s nothing in between and no middle ground for processing and categorizing life events

Negative: I’ll disappoint everyone if I change my mind.

Positive: I have the power to change my mind. Others will understand.

Negative: I failed and embarrassed myself.

Positive: I’m proud of myself for even trying. That took courage.

Negative: I’m overweight and out of shape. I might as well not bother.

Positive: I am capable and strong, and I want to get healthier for me.

Negative: I let everyone on my team down when I didn’t score.

Positive: Sports are a team event. We win and lose together.

Negative: I’ve never done this before and I’ll be bad at it.

Positive: This is a wonderful opportunity for me to learn from others and grow.

Negative: There’s just no way this will work.

Positive: I can and will give it my all to make it work.

• Identify negative self-talk traps. Certain scenarios may increase your self-doubt and lead to more negative self-talk. Work events, for example, may be particularly hard. Pinpointing when you experience the most negative self-talk can help you anticipate and prepare.

• Check in with your feelings. Stop during events or bad days and evaluate your self-talk. Is it becoming negative? How can you turn it around?

• Find the humor. Laughter can help relieve stress and tension. When you need a boost for positive self-talk, find ways to laugh, such as watching funny animal videos or a comedian.

• Surround yourself with positive people. Whether or not you notice it, you can absorb the outlook and emotions of people around you. This includes negative and positive, so choose positive people when you can.

• Give yourself positive affirmations. Sometimes, seeing positive words or inspiring images can be enough to redirect your thoughts. Post small reminders in your office, in your home, and anywhere you spend a significant amount of time.

• Use “I” messages rather than “you” messages. Saying “I feel angry” rather than “You made me angry” enables you to express your feelings without blaming others or causing them to become defensive.

• Respect the rights and feelings of others. Do not say something that will violate another personʼs rights or intentionally hurt the personʼs feelings. Recognize that the other person has the right to express feelings.

• Be clear and specific. Speak directly to the person. Donʼt hint or hope the person will guess what you need. Other people are not mind readers. When you speak directly about what you need or feel, you are taking the risk that the other person might disagree or say no to your request, but that action also shows respect for the other personʼs opinion. When both parties speak directly, the chances of reaching understanding are greater.

• Be a good listener. Listening is the most important aspect of communication

• Consider the personʼs special abilities and interests. If you know a friend enjoys cooking but dislikes driving, your chances of getting help improve if you ask for help with meal preparation.

• Resist asking the same person repeatedly. Do you keep asking the same person because she has trouble saying no?

• Pick the best time to make a request. Timing is important. A person who is tired and stressed might not be available to help out. Wait for a better time.

• Prepare a list of things that need doing. The list might include errands, yard work, or a visit with your loved one. Let the “helper” choose what she would like to do.

• Be prepared for hesitance or refusal. It can be upsetting for the caregiver when a person is unable or unwilling to help. But in the long run, it would do more harm to the relationship if the person helps only because he doesnʼt want to upset you. To the person who seems hesitant, simply say, “Why donʼt you think about it.” Try not to take it personally when a request is turned down. The person is turning down the task, not you. Try not to let a refusal prevent you from asking for help again. The person who refused today may be happy to help at another time.

• Avoid weakening your request. “Itʼs only a thought, but would you consider staying with Grandma while I went to church?” This request sounds like itʼs not very important to you. Use “I” statements to make specific requests: “I would like to go to church on Sunday. Would you stay with Grandma from 9 a.m. until noon?”

Gilliland noted that energy loss is “the most common and confusing side effect of this pandemic, especially for people that are typically active or frequent exercisers...All this stress and worry starts to drain our battery in a hurry and by mid-afternoon, most people are on a slippery slope to the couch or bed.”

Perhaps you’re tired all the time and you want to sleep, but no dice. Or maybe you do fall asleep, but the quality isn’t great. Blame it on your anxiety. “Insomnia frequently occurs in anxious people,” Talley said

Do what you can to create a nighttime ritual, stick to a consistent bedtime, avoid screens for an hour or so before bed, and limit caffeine intake in the afternoon so you can support your sleep cycle the best you can.

We all get startled from time to time, but if you’re more jumpy than usual it’s time to take notice. Your body and brain could be on high alert because of anxiety.

If your anxiety is presenting in tension and hypervigilance, “it doesn’t take much of the unexpected to have us come unwound,” Gilliland said

Excessive enthusiasm or extreme productivity might be your coping mechanism, or how your anxiety is presenting. “Some may find that they now tend to focus their mental energies on organizing their schedules, or the house or shopping routines,” Talley said. “The ability to gain control through organizing provides a counterbalance to the sense of having little control over that which makes them anxious.”

Make sure you’re taking time to rest and confront anything you may be feeling.

On the flip side, “COVID anxiety can appear as apathy,” said Habib Sadeghi, an integrative health expert and author of “The Clarity Cleanse.”

This is because routines that have given us structure and a sense of purpose are now disrupted or gone entirely. “When we can’t follow our routine or do the things that are important to us, like work, go to school, or work out, life can feel meaningless,” Sadeghi said.

The antidote? “It’s important to use this time to create new routines for ourselves and find new interests,” he said. (Just be careful not to fall into the trap mentioned above. There is a balance.)

A remedy to this is not necessarily the most ideal option, but it can work: virtual connection. “Be sure you’re reaching out to family and friends over the phone and on live chat video platforms like Zoom,” he said. “Seeing and/or hearing the other person provides a connection that’s more personal and nurturing.”

It’s super-important to keep tabs on your emotions and ensure you have the right resources to support your mental health. Reach out to your therapist if you have one, and if you don’t try chatting with a professional via teletherapy or another support route. Also, stay on top of any medications you need, journal and take time for yourself. Do whatever you need to do to prioritize your mind.

Talley noted that you may see some physical symptoms that may appear to be all over the map. Think headaches, dizziness, heart palpitations, ulcers, insomnia, rashes, hand tremors, general restlessness and gastrointestinal issues. Keep an eye out for these, and use them as a “check engine light” of sorts. They could be a sign you’re experiencing major anxiety.

“For people who feel that some important aspect of life is in danger ― like their health or the health of loved ones ― and that they have little control over the outcome, it is not unusual for them to become angry,” Talley said. “The more one is used to feeling in control, the more likely one is to feel anger.”

This anger may be directed at yourself or at others. You might be overly self-critical about everything you do at work or pick apart your appearance, for example. Or you may find yourself snapping or getting frustrated with those around you.

Having trouble staying on top of your to-dos? Forget something you were in the middle of? This is a cognitive symptom of anxiety, Talley said. Your brain is overloaded with stress and may struggle to manage tasks and mental checklists that seemed routine before.